Saturday, January 5, 2013

Table for One . . .

If a meeting takes place and only one person shows up, is it really a meeting?

Obviously not, but I don't want to take this too seriously.  I set up an alternate book club meeting, one for those of us who got wait listed for the real book club meeting. I'm fairly new in town, serious about reading and serious about meeting new people.  So I suggested it, and a few people expressed interest.  But no one else came.

Truthfully, I'm disappointed.  I got myself all geared up to meet people and have some fun girl talk, be a participant in something besides my own family drama for a bit.  And my disappointment is all out of proportion to what actually happened.  I didn't get stood up for prom, I didn't get left at the altar, I bombed on my attempt to organize an alternate book club.  It's not life or death.

But I'm vulnerable because I've isolated myself while raising kids and moving to a new town.  I'm finally ready for the self imposed isolation to end.  And really, that's the good news.  I'm over being so self protective that I have no other adult contact besides work (with all my twenty something co-workers) and family.

And I don't want that social contact to be about dating, which would be my mom's solution.  Find a man.  I just want some friends, friends who understand my stuff, because they can empathize, because they can relate.

So, I just found out that I'm really ready to become part of the living again.  I'm still here, still something besides a mom or a bookkeeper.  And I'm ready to have and be a friend.  Strike up the band and look out, because this is something I can sink my teeth into!

Carpe Diem!